As part of Neil’s Great Interview Experiment (you should sign up!), I was super-duper lucky to be interviewed by Ree of Hotfessional fame. (Btw? Go read her blog. Not to whore her out to the internet or anything, but she’s awesome. And she said it would be okay for me to drink vodka while answering these questions. Really, can you ask for a better interviewer than that? The answer is no, you can’t.)

Now for the questions:

Favorite Middle-eastern food?
Arab baklava.  But you have to say it the right way: BAWK-law-wah.

How many Kate Spade items do you have?
Not nearly enough, seeing as I break something new every week.  On Super Bowl Sunday, a ceiling fan took my new sunglasses right off my head when I jumped a bit too high at the local bar.

How do you explain your auto-immune deficiency to others?
If it’s a new doctor, I smuggle in some tequila and say, “Oh, you are going to NEED this when I’m through.”  Otherwise, I don’t really talk about it much.  To be honest, I have some of the weirdest medical issues, so I feel strangely guilty bringing up another one to anyone other than family.

Are Kyle and Sona going to get back together?
I don’t know, Kyle’s off doing his own thing (read as: continuing on his mission to impregnate as many fifteen year olds as possible).

If you told me what Sona does in Quantico, would you have to kill me?
No, but Sona might.  She is in the Marine Corps, training to be a translator.  After that, she’s in the Middle East for a couple years.  She’s originally from Iraq, you see, and she’s looking forward to kicking some insurgent ass.

Which arm did you break?
I basically shattered my carpals in my wrist.  My school nurse told the ER doctor I broke my arm (elbow) so when I arrived with just a broken wrist, the doctor went ape-shit and bitched and moaned and shook my arm with annoyance/impatience.  I remember, being nine years old and thinking, “You dickhead.”  Thankfully, my mom said it for me.

How does anyone name their kid Brady Bunches?
His parents were bizarre (who sends their nine year old to school with Kahlua-filled chocolates for lunch?).  The one time I met them, his dad started licking the school walls. Not gonna lie, it was a little awkward.

Can you tell me where your piercings are?
Both ears are double-pierced and my belly button is too.

What was the best word you ever made playing Scrabble?
I flubbed a lot of words, but the best one I ever played was quaxi.  It’s not even a word, but everyone bought it because when I was a loner, I read the dictionary.  I think I gave a definition as some arithmetic term. Anyway, I won like 8 bazillion points.

Who was your date for Prom?
Sona. I’m not obsessed with her, I promise.  Or maybe I am.  Just a little, though.

Where do you buy candles that smell like cleaning products?
At the Bump ‘N Dent.  One of those food warehouses that sell expired food or products that didn’t really hit it on the market.  For some crazy reason, people don’t like Clorox or Pine-Sol scented candles.

Thank you, Ree, for the fantastic, creative questions. If you were around here, I’d toast to you with vodka.